Challenging day -- entirely because of me, being me... the queen of overthinking.
Nerves still working on healing, so skin "talking" to me regularly which is at best annoying. it was time to take the bandage off my incision, so i did... neck looks a bit frankenstein to me, but then it's healthy and not red or bloody, so i'll take that reality.
worked the past two days -- it was nice to bury my mental thinking in something practical and make progress on an assignment... and have discussions with colleagues about non-medical topics! it was also difficult to be focused and yet remember to get up and move regularly so that the neck doesn't seize up.
tomorrow is radiation mapping. thursday is chemo for the week. and then i get more opportunities to practice living in the present moment, seeing what else is going to come visit.
i keep asking myself if i am gracious enough for this storm that i face, and sometimes it seems overwhelmingly big and daunting. and then i realize i don't have to deal with the entire storm, just today's events... and not even all of today's drama, just this moment in front of me.
so i do the necessary things, and let the rest pile up... and treasure when there are emails or people mail or texts to help me remember that there are a mountain of people who are thinking of me, caring enough to reach out, paying attention, commenting on the blog, laughing with me when i laugh, weeping for me and with me, holding my soul in attention.
somehow i will get through this, some days only because of your support... i appreciate you!
Bea. There is a lake in the square! And people here are fishing daily. Sportingly. Never thought I'd see it here. Today also I saw a bird that looked like a hawk. Tomorrow I will investigate. The square is getting gorgeous! People are planting many trees. My brother planted several fruit trees. Send you more news tomorrow. Hugs Luciano
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