i don't always feel strong against this storm -- i guess because *my* internal definition of strength was informed by a bodybuilder, and it often was noted that i was a wimp...
but there is a resilience in me, a desire to bend and adapt and be fully willing to accept today's reality, rather than resist it... and that is a deeper and broader strength than the ability to bench press my weight!
perhaps what i see in myself is that flexible strength that i associate with
i continue to believe that i have options at every step of the way -- not always the options i would like or choose for myself, but options still. i was laughing at myself, worrying that i still have actively metabolic cancer in my neck and wondering whether it would degrade that piece of cadaver bone or the two that are holding the plates -- all that extra structure that has made it possible for me to get in/out of bed.... and THEN i decided not to bring trouble to my present until it really IS an issue.
Perhaps "strong" is not the perfect word. I do not think of a blade of grass as strong. It seems so fragile. Yet in a field of grass, there is power. Individual blades may break, but the field endures. Not only does it have the power to endure, but it has the power to feed and nourish a whole ecosystem of lifeforms. Mere strength stands against forces. Power gives. You are powerful because of the myriad little decisions and attitudes and victories in your daily life. And your power gives to the rest of us who are in your ecosystem. Thank you for being powerful.
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